Tag: Jesus

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Easter/ Resurrection Sunday

I have been volunteering in the children’s ministry of my church for about 5 years. For the past 3 Easters, I volunteered to help with the festivities for the kiddos. My church goes all out for Easter: activities include a bouncy house station, blow up basketball games station, an ice cream/video station, bible trivia station, and lastly, the group games and tattoos station, which I was in charge of this year. In the group games/ tattoo station, there was a huge box outlined in tape and divided in two, filled with colorful plastic balls. The kids were to be divided in two teams, hence why the box was divided in two, and the object of the game was for the kids to throw as many balls to the other side as they could, and the side with the least amount of balls would win the game. They had about a minute to do it. I had to facilitate this game and make sure everything ran smoothly. It was a little chaotic at times as kids were already starting to throw and kick balls before I even gave instructions, but overall it went well. The first graders followed instructions the best (LOL). As a first year teacher, I’ll be the first to tell you, managing a group of kids is no easy task haha but thank God for the teacher helpers and volunteers who helped keep the kids on task. After the game, the kids went to the tables and chairs in the back. The tables were filled with different tattoos, and the kids got to choose one, and put it on.

Full Circle Moment: While facilitating the games, my station helper handed me a microphone, being that the room was pretty big and there would be a great amount of children. It helped significantly with running the games and projecting my voice to reach everyone. When I finished facilitating the games, I had a full circle moment. These games took place in the church’s chapel. Years back, during my teenage years, I suffered with severe social anxiety, and I remember being in this same chapel, during youth service events, very anxious. During praise and worship, I was too scared to sing out loud or even lift my hands. I was always concerned about who may be looking at me. It was terrible, and I sometimes felt like God did not care, because I was not seeing results as quickly as I wanted to. But here I was, many years later, on the MICROPHONE, leading games, to a large number of kids, very boldly and very confidently. I told my mom in the car, “God got me on the microphone.” And only He could get the credit for that. What better day than RESURRECTION SUNDAY, to fully be in awe of the resurrection power that is available to all of us, and is in work in all of us, giving us the strength and power to do things we could never do on our own. You may be in a situation that seems very impossible and difficult, and may wonder where God is. He’s there with you, and can already see you totally delivered and free from what is binding you, though you may not be able to at the moment. With God, your situation will always end in VICTORY, so as my pastor always says, “If it’s negative, GOD’s not done. And if God is not done, you’re not done!”

I also wanted to share my Easter meal. My family has been requesting some roti and curry duck for so long, haha. My mom made some bussup-shut roti, curry duck, channa, and curried potatoes. It was sooooooooo yummy. Enjoy this picture.

Thanks for reading. He is Risen!!!!

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On a Self-Love, Healing Journey

2023 will be all about self love. I’ve heard the word self-love so many times, and even thought I had mastered the art of self-love, but boy did the past few months prove me wrong. I think the true test of self-love is how you react to adversity and losses. It is how you react when you are in completely vulnerable situations. Are you battered up in shame, unease, and ghosts from your past, everytime you experience failure or setbacks? Or are you gentle with yourself, give yourself grace, and recognize your own humanity?

Recently, I had to question myself. “Why are you always feeling bad for not measuring up to the expectations of others?” In other words, “why do you keep giving others so much power over you?” 

It is like I could not be at peace, unless I was sure I was on good terms with everyone. Any thought of anyone being upset, annoyed or frustrated with me would cause a great deal of discomfort and shame. And this is a product of my people-pleasing past. 

I found myself feeling like I had to be a whole different person in order to be accepted or that something must be wrong with me, because I was not seeing the results in my life that I wanted. Thoughts of comparison would come along with guilt for not being what others may have expected. Very rarely, did I give myself any grace. 

Adversity is usually not fun or pleasant, but what I like about it is it brings our dysfunction to the surface. God shakes our world up sometimes to reveal what is in our hearts. And He showed me that I’ve been putting too much worth in “my image,” and less on His WORD and THOUGHTS of me, which is infinitely more important and THE TRUTH.

I recently started renewing my mind more consistently and intentionally by reciting  scriptures daily and my life has shifted tremendously. Am I where I want to be? No, but I am progressing.

A game changer scripture that has helped me is:

“I am the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus”– 2 Corinthians 5:21

To be righteous means to be justified and perfect in God’s sight. Jesus died and took our place so that we could be made right with God, have a relationship with God, live an abundant, purposeful life, and get to spend eternity with God. The reason why this scripture has impacted me is because I am no longer basing my worth on MY performance or actions, but resting in my identity in Christ. It is no longer about what I do, but who Christ is in me.  

“I am crucified with Christ, nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me. And the life which I now live in the flesh, I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.” – Galatians 2:20

I had a few days recently where I was not feeling satisfied with my performance. Like a full blown negativity fest. One day, while listening to a message from one of my favorite pastors, I went into my closet, as I was deciding on the outfit I would wear the following day.

I was looking for a white tank top, and picked up the first white tank that I saw. The words on the shirt brought me to tears. This was one of my old work-out shirts that I purchased a few years ago. The words said:

PROGRESS, NOT PERFECTION

I really believe the Holy Spirit was speaking to me through this old shirt of mine. Do not strive for perfection, just progression. 

My message is to take the pressure off of yourself. Definitely strive for excellence and always be open to learning/growth, but stop placing so much value on getting everything right. If no one was watching, you probably would not care as much, so just try to live as if it is just you and God. At the end of the day, God’s approval is all that matters.

Fail with grace. Make mistakes with grace. Fall down with grace. Be human with grace. 

Also, enjoy who God created you to be. The personality you have. The quirks you have. The strengths you have. The style/swag you have. The gifts and passions you have. Put more energy into that.

Take care of yourself and enjoy life. You deserve that. 

God, the all powerful creator of the universe, designed you, intricately and with extreme care. He knows every little detail about you and your life. He knows your past, thoughts, insecurities, failures, and all the ugliness, and yet still loves and accepts you. That should be enough for you to love yourself, period! 

Keep being you.

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I WANT TO BE THIS LITTLE GIRL, AGAIN

“At that time the disciples came to Jesus, saying, “Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them and said, “Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. “Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me.” Matthew 18:1-35

    I find it very interesting that Jesus magnifies children as the greatest in the kingdom of Heaven. You would think He would say preachers, prophets, or people who dedicated their lives to serving Him. But no, children.

    If you really think about it, children are precious, but can often be viewed as helpless, annoying, needy, exhausting, etc. Children are not always looked at in the highest regard.

For some reason, as a child, I always felt like the adults were the lucky ones. They got to stay up late, leave the house at their leisure, buy anything they wanted, and live freely without rules or punishment. Feeling like a kid sucked sometimes because we were limited.

    LET’S BE REAL. A lot of us were very excited to become adults because of the freedom associated with it, and that is fine. We would have the power to create the life we wanted without others enforcing their agendas on us, though that still happens sometimes, we ultimately would have the power. As an adult now, I’M LOVING IT, because of the independence!

    However, there are some child-like traits that I want to have again that got lost in the midst of growing up in this world.

    I remember in third grade, I decided to draw my whole class these random pictures, and put them in these white envelopes with their names on it. I do not know what compelled me to do this, but I did it. Looking back, I find that to be totally BOLD. These pictures were not Picasso material, and yet I still had enough confidence to give them out, despite what my classmates would have thought. My classmates were very intrigued and were all talking about what kind of pictures they got. It did put me in a vulnerable position, because I did not know how the pictures would have been received, but the bottom line is, I DID IT. Now, if I were to do that today, there probably would be more hesitancy and doubt, because of the over-thinking that comes with being an adult.

    In fourth grade, I ran for class president! FOURTH GRADE! I remember making my posters and saying my speech in front of the whole school in the auditorium. TALK BOUT BOLD. Even though I did not win, the fact that I still put myself out there just showcases the inner-courage that was already inside of me.

    I felt like as a kid, everything just seemed more exciting, even the small things. Life was approached as a mystery and wonder. As we age, the spark gets lost, and it is up to us to find it again. I truly miss not caring what others thought and just doing what I said I was going to do, without overthinking, doubting, or worrying. I miss where my imagination used to go. I miss being unapologetically me. I had no reputation to cling to or money to worry about. I legit had nothing to show for. I was just being me.

    I think this is what Jesus was implying. When you are a child, you believe everything, without getting so deep in thought. You do whatever you have to do, without fear of judgment because you are not all up in your head.

    Being like a child would entail us fully depending on God, as we would our parents, and not in anything we have. As adults, we sometimes allow our career, social status, accomplishments, income, relationships, good deeds, etc to define, sustain, or qualify us, when in reality, God could care less about that. GOD OWNS THE WORLD, you think He cares about those superficial qualities? Being like a child would mean letting go of your roles, titles, status, possessions, or any earthly label in exchange for God’s word, purpose, and process. It means TRUSTING in God, no matter what. It means taking YOU out of the equation. Jesus regards this behavior as the highest in the Kingdom of heaven.

    Jesus himself, the king of kings, was of NO REPUTATION. That should blow your mind. His life was dedicated to serving others and God, even though He had the power to do ANYTHING. He could have lived any life he wanted, but chose to be a SERVANT. He could care less about people’s opinions because He knew his purpose, which was to honor God, even if it made him look lame, silly, or unpopular. God’s kingdom was regarded higher than the things of the Earth. In other words, if you think Earth is the best you’ve seen, then you are living a lie, because Heaven is 10X better. Streets of GOLD????? Yeah, okay.

    Bottom line, I think we should strive to let go of any earthly obsessions and just get over ourselves. Yes, love yourself, and build the best life you can, but at the end of the day, we’re nothing without God. As humans, we sometimes act very prideful, as if we are invincible or the best thing to ever walk the Earth, based on materially or superficial qualities, but we’re not. When we die, our bodies will become dirt, and it is only our spirits that will live on. Feed the spirit and magnify your spiritual identity, because you are a spirit. Make a bigger deal about what is unseen, rather than what is seen. Real riches are in Heaven! Surrender your bodies to God because He can do so much more with it than we can. Let go of any selfish ambitions and desires that do not benefit anyone but yourself.

    I am not saying that you should not invest in yourself, take care of yourself, or enjoy your life. I’m not saying you can’t have nice possessions, or have a luxurious life. God has an abundant, enriching life for us all (AND I WANT GOD’S VERY BEST, HONEY). I just think we sometimes make a bigger deal out of superficial, temporary earthly fantasies that do nothing for us in the long haul. Just make sure that the things of the Earth DO NOT DEFINE OR HAVE YOU! The true path of life is one of surrender and service to God, even if it looks crazy to the world. God has MORE for us than what we think we want or what the world promotes, best believe that.

    Trust me, I am still learning to apply these principles to my life and make changes. This message is definitely for me too. It is challenging because everything is always about what the flesh wants, and as a result, we neglect our spirits. It is truly a spiritual fight, EVERYDAY. But like a child, we must cling to God, and let go of ourselves. It will be a process, but a very worthwhile one.